Shopping

I think it is pretty well acknowledged by Singaporeans and visitors that the true national sport in Singapore is Shopping, with a capital S. Everywhere you go, malls are overflowing with Singaporeans and their accompanying maids, drifting around with big shopping bags as if their whole life revolves around the latest, cheapest bargains for branded goods.

As a visitor, my problem is that I am an easy mark. As an Aussie, as soon as I venture into a shop, especially one that sells technology, I will be accosted by a sales clerk in a split millisecond, overwhelming me with questions like "what are you looking for, how much have you seen it for, because I can beat that price!". When this happens I just walk out of the shop. Please, please, please let me have a bit of a look around before you prance on me like a lioness finding a young wildebeest separated from the herd.

Food

Yummy, yummy, yummy. Nothing more to say.

Except – how come my boyfriend eats more than me and still has a six-pack. He reckons I don't have those firm washboard abs since I indulge in six-packs of beer. Needless to say, beer-aholics like me don’t believe that twaddle!

Nightclubs

I cannot understand why only one person is only allowed to handle the money till at certain nightclubs. One particular night at the Superclub Ministry of Sound, which boasts an escalator (yes, Singaporeans have this obsession with moving stairs), it only took me about 30 seconds to get served but nearly 5 minutes to pay. No wonder the bar is always crowded.

And don’t get me started on the price of drinks!

The Singapore tradition of buying a jug for the group and sharing is not good for me. I am not a big dancer though my partner is the Energiser Bunny who can dance non-stop for days!. So I get left protecting the jug. But who protects me from the jug? No-one, that’s who, the group are all off dancing. Which means I keep drinking it – pretending to myself that by using a different straw each time I take a sip, I am not drinking too much. I empty it while the group is dancing. And making another 5 minute trip of waiting at the bar to pay for another one before they get back – and then having to get it down to the same level it was before their dance-marathon. And then the vicious cycle starts again once their batteries are recharged.

Transport

The MRT is fantastic. Clean, efficient and air-conditioned. The EzyLink card system is tremendous – I just wish that Sydney would introduce a similar system.

Only one issue I have with the MRT. Let people off first! The train is not going without you, and if you wait until people get off there will be more room for you. Honest!

The buses are totally incomprehensible to me. Roads sometimes have two different names (English and Chinese) and I never know which one is which. I know that the bus system is extensive, but could someone please design a map so that I can get on the right bus going the right direction and going close to where I need to be (walking in Singapore and me are not compatible – see the weather section). And while they are at it, can someone invent a big warning for me so that when getting off the bus I remember to touch-out my EzyLink card. I do not like subsidising the entire Singapore transport system by paying the maximum fare everytime. At least on the trains they have barriers to remind me to touch-out.

Laundry

I admit it, I am lazy. When travelling I always rely on service washes – where you drop your dirty clothes off at either a dry cleaners or a Laundromat. You come back the next day – hey presto – clean clothes.

So why in Singapore does it take over a week to get a service wash performed (is there only one person who is allowed to touch the washing machine – much like that only one bar-staff member is allowed to touch the till?) For the overseas travellers reading this, I did find one place that did a service wash in a single day and at prices way under the hotels – it is just near the Gallery Hotel (now if I could only remember which bus to catch to get there).

Weather

I know this is stating the obvious – but, damn, it is humid in Singapore. A few minutes without aircon and it looks like I put my clothes on straight from the washer - without drying them first. My boyfriend would comment to me at 10pm at night – "Why are you sweating, baby?"….

One of the reasons that I love Europe is that it has weather. Sun, wind, rain, snow, hot, cold. The same temperature and humidity every day is not weather!

Like Sydney, I do not know why Singapore has weather forecasts – they are a waste of time. Sydney is always 25 and sunny; Singapore is always 30, humid with an afternoon thunderstorm. I think we could eliminate weather forecasts in these two cities, and only have them when something unusual is going to happen to the weather.

Being Gay

For a city-state where it is illegal, being gay in Singapore is surprising liberal (I am sorry to tell the government this). My partner and I never had a problem when checking into a hotel, and we were always greeted warmly at restaurants as a couple. And the gay bars and nightclubs are amongst the nicest in the world I have been to. And as a white guy, I do like that I can get a bit of attention from the local gay boys (and on one occasion a scary TV – but that is a whole other story) – and it makes my partner a little jealous (hehe).

In Summary

I really do like Singapore – even though I am a mobile shower when walking around. I have never had a Singaporean be rude to me, people smile and laugh, the food is always nice, and the place is always clean.