| May
2005
Get real - girls watching girls source: RedQueen email list
|
|
|
A letter from 'A Concerned citizen' to Mediacorp about their recently
aired TV program 'Get Real'. Letter sent Sunday 22 May 2005.
To whoever concerned, I am a bisexual girl, studying in a mixed JC. I am extremely proud of who I am, and I do not feel that by loving other women, I am doing something wrong. I am deeply disturbed by the way you have chosen to portray lesbians in Singapore. When I first heard about the program over radio, I was happy that someone was finally choosing to break the silence. However, after watching your program, I rather the silence not be broken. Especially not by a group of homophobes who have very little idea of girl-girl relationships. I feel that you have chosen to write off lesbians are school-girls, usually from single-sex schools, who just hook up with other girls as a passing phase. And from then on, they "turn" straight and find their true heterosexual love - as Jasmine has, apparently. From this itself, I can easily see that you have hardly done any research on this topic. I myself discovered my sexuality around the age of 16, when I was still in a girls' school - but that had nothing to do with it, because I did not have any school-girl crushes on other girls in four years. Until I met that one girl who brought out who I am. I am in a mixed JC now, and I still feel for both girls and boys. How is that for passing school-girl fancies? You interviewed sports people, like Jocelyn Yeo, who was homophobic enough to publicly declare she wasn't gay. Okay, that's her prerogative. But what is she doing on a program focusing on school-girl lesbians, if she is straight? How can they in any way contribute to the public's knowledge about lesbians, if they are straight? All I heard was them talking about how their young female fans worshipped them. Big deal - girls at that age will worship anyone (the multitude of girls liking un-good-looking Sylvester Sim should be a prime example). So what about all those lesbians who are at my age and older? Their love for other girls is hardly hero-worship. I am very unhappy that you chose to interview straight and exlesbians for this program, and not a single lesbian, who is perhaps living happily with her girlfriend. But that is bad, isn't it, showing a happy same-sex relationship? It might actually turn people gay, right? Wrong. Homosexuality is an inborn trait, like brown eyes, or blonde hair. Did the script-writer know, for example, that 2-10% of any population is homosexual? That number has been relatively constant throughout the ages, and it isn't likely to change. Being gay is not easy. It takes guts to stand up for who we are, and lead a happy stable life despite what the society tells us and how they discriminate against us. Therefore, I don't see why these girls would choose to become lesbian just because someone wrote them a sappy letter. (I myself wrote and received none of these letters, mind you. So would someone on the program explain how I "became" a "lesbian"?) Instead of showing neutrality in this issue as any respectable News channel should, the tone in your program was decidely anti-gay. I doubt there was a single gay female or male on your team when you wrote this program: in all probability, it was written by a homophobic straight male, as is seen by the biased tone in your program. Throughout the half-an-hour, all I saw was Ms Diana Ser trying to discredit lesbianism as a passing phase, instead of properly educating people about it. Did you know, for example, that lesbians do not just consist of butches and femmes, but androgynous girls, and a variety of women who do not identify with either label (like me)? The popular conception of lesbianism consisting just of butch-femme relationships is not true. And your program reflects your lack of knowledge about that, because all I see on the program are shots of butches and their femme girlfriends. So, Ms/Mr.Whoever-you-are-who-wrote-this-episode, before you start telling people about lesbianism, I suggest you actually do some research, because it is readily apparent you have absolutely no conception about the lesbian community or culture in Singapore. Even the way you try to stereotype us falls short of a convincing argument. We have to deal with enough homophobia from our fellow human beings as it is, without programs such as this adding fat to fire. A Concerned Citizen * * * * * The reply from Mediacorp, dated sometime before 28 May 2005 when I received a copy of it. Dear Concerned Citizen, Much thanks for watching Get Rea! and for taking the time to send us your feedback on last week's episode, GIRLS WATCHING GIRLS. My apologies for the lateness of this reply. We received quite a bit of mixed responses to that episode. Those with young lesbian daughters/sisters shared their family's experiences, and were glad the issue was discussed at all, so parents can be aware of it. Some asked if we knew of parents support groups they could join. Others who are lesbians, like yourself, were unhappy with us for 1) "implying" lesbians only come from all girls school and 2) not putting on a lesbian who can defend her life choices and lifestyle. Let me assure you we are not a bunch of "homophobic straight males". Nor are we a bunch of homophobic straight females. This particular episode was in fact produced by a female producer. She did research this issue. I must also share that most of us on the team have homosexual friends, some may have gone straight, but many have not. We are familiar with the culture, the terms used, the arguments on how homosexuality may have begun for some people etc. We are also well aware of the struggles they face in dealing with family members and the community at large who do not or cannot accept their life choices. It is a hard life, living on the fringe and not being accepted by those around you. And we had no intention of adding "fat to the fire" as you put it. In all our productions, Get Rea! have always zoomed in to one aspect of a particular issue. This is so we can look at that aspect in greater depth within a 23 minute programme (minus commercials). If we were to cover all aspects/angles, then the whole programme ends up skimming over everything without getting a good discussion going. For this particular episode, we were very clear we were looking at how some of these relationships begin in some all-girls schools, and also what happens to those who are tomboys, how they have been misunderstood. Hence the programme you saw. In fact, the idea for this episode came up when some parents discussing the school of choice for their daughters at the P1 registration phase said perhaps an all-girls school is not a good idea. This, because of the lesbian culture in some of the schools. However we did not imply this happens only in an all girls school. On the programme, we reported that social workers say it was "more pronounced in single sex schools". As for being "anti-gay" - I think some viewers may have missed the part where Joscelin Yeo said parents don't have to worry. And there's also the counsellor who spoke on how some schools are handling the issue and why theirs may not be the best way. As for this being a "passing phase", we never did say it was so. What we did say was, we wrote to 13 all girls schools, only 5 responded and one of them said it was an issue in their school but it was a "passing phase." That, was the school's view. Once again, let me assure you we were not anti-gay, not pro-gay on this programme. We were merely highlighting one aspect of a complicated bigger issue. I hope this addresses some of your concerns and that you will continue to watch Get Rea! And as always, do send your feedback and suggestions to getreal@channelnewsasia.com Regards, Foong Ming Lee Foong Ming (Mrs)
|
|
|
|
Footnotes None Addenda None
|
|
