For a long time, this has been the unwritten code guiding how the homosexual community relates -- or should relate -- to the mainstream society in Singapore.

People are not asked as a matter of course if they are homosexual. Homosexuals do not have to tell and, as long as they do not promote their lifestyle, they can enjoy their pockets of freedom.

Underlying this code is the belief that the less said about homosexuals and their activities, the better the rest can live and let live, and the more homosexuals can go about their lives.

It would tell of perceived discriminations against the gay minority, and promote the idea that homosexuality and its activities should not be stigmatised, criminalised or censored.

On Tuesday, the Public Entertainment Licensing Unit of the Home Affairs Ministry rejected his application for a permit to hold the forum. [2]

In the clearest terms yet, the authorities said the forum would advance and legitimise the cause of homosexuals in Singapore.

As the mainstream moral values of Singaporeans are conservative and homosexual acts are unlawful, it would be contrary to the public interest to allow the forum, the police said.

So, for now at least, the status quo is protected.

But can it be maintained?

WHETHER society likes it or not, there is now a thriving gay scene with gay bars and clubs. Nothing hush-hush about it, too Impressive guide-lists are available on various websites, such as the Utopia Homo Page.

Artistic experimentation has also become bolder. Some local plays have fleshed out gay-related dilemmas.

Bookstores, which used to carry one or two gay-related books, now have four to five shelves dedicated to them.

Says Tanjong Pagar GRC MP S. Vasoo, who heads the Government Parliamentary Committee on Community Development "As I see it, anyone in Singapore can have his private interests and everyone can do anything he wants in his life, so long as it does not violate the laws of our society."

Song-writer and Lianhe Zaobao columnist Ng King Kang is aghast that homosexuality and lesbianism are lumped together with "incest, paedophilia, bestiality and necrophilia".

"Is this being conservative or plain ignorant?" he asks rhetorically, wondering if this law could withstand scrutiny.

Another source of grievance is the mainstream media, which many homosexuals tend to view as an adversary. According to sociologist Leong Wai Teng, in his article on Singapore in a 1997 book, Sociolegal Control Of Homosexuality "The media treats gays as criminals, perverts and subjects for gossip and scandal."

In a sense, the gay community has used these laws and guidelines as a kind of mirror, observing their reflection in the statutes criminalising their activities.

Nominated MP Claire Chiang says she has asked several gay activists what they want to do that they cannot already do discreetly. Why, a few years back, she was even invited to a gay "wedding" here. Their common response, she says, was that they crave social acceptance and affection.

The homosexuals, being a fringe minority, lack the political clout to affect change. They do not enjoy widespread grassroots support, but have won a growing group of sympathisers from the ranks of the secular elite.

IN RECENT years, a series of catalysing events have served as an ongoing impetus for the more vocal homosexuals to act on their unhappiness.

One is the Government's rejection of their application to form a society called People Like Us (PLU) in 1997.

Its stated mission: To promote awareness and understanding of the issues and problems concerning gay, lesbian and bisexual persons.

Its application was rejected without official explanation in 1997, despite appeals right up to the Prime Minister.

Furthermore, as Mr Ng documents in his 1999 book, The Rainbow Connection The Internet And The Singapore Gay Community, the wealth of information available online on gay-related issues has the effect of personal empowerment.

According to Mr Au, websites reporting the strides made by gay movements elsewhere have also emboldened the gay community here to step out.

So galvanised, gay activists here latched on to the Government's promise of opening up.

After all, they recall, in an S21 forum early this year, Deputy Prime Minister Lee Hsien Loong said "There is no policy too sensitive to question, and no subject so taboo that you cannot even mention it."

Indeed, it was mentioned -- and loudly -- during a live CNN interview with Senior Minister Lee Kuan Yew in 1998 A gay man phoned to ask if gay people have a place in Singapore "as we move into a more tolerant millennium".

Mr Lee's reply, in a nutshell It is a question of what a society considers acceptable, and Singaporeans are still largely very conservative.

PUBLIC attitudes towards homosexuality are varied and uneven across different groups. They are tied up closely with community norms and religious values in this multi-racial and multi-religious society.

So, it is all right to have a homosexual orientation as long as the homosexuals are chaste. 

There is nothing on the matter under the five Buddhist precepts, he mumbles.

Faced with such a mixed reception, gays have erected their own altars on the Internet, publicising groups such as Gay Christian Fellowship and Gay Buddhist Fellowship.

Among other things, it found that of the 240 polled on the Internet, 74 per cent felt they would be able to accept a gay sibling, if not immediately then after a while.

In contrast, of the 251 polled on the streets, including HDB neighbourhoods, 46 per cent said the same. This suggests that the Internet-savvy elite might be more open to the matter.

In stronger terms, Mr Masagos Zulkifli, the president of the association of adult Islamic religious students, Perdaus, says Singapore should not be seen to promote social practices that are not acceptable by the religious groups here.

Perdaus does not think that homosexuality and lesbianism are consistent with the S21 vision, which aims to strengthen the family institution.

So, while some community norms may evolve, one remains rock solid The family as the basic building block, with the responsibility of carrying this unit into the next generation.

Against such a background, acceptance of a community of homosexual people seems difficult. Opponents are thus inclined to link gay people's defiance of conservative sexual morality with an "anything goes" lifestyle that undermines the structure of society.

Similar concerns prompted the authorities in Britain to ban in 1988 "the teaching in any maintained school of the acceptability of homosexuality as a pretended family relationship".

But one should not over-simplify or over-generalise.

Father Teo says that he knows many homosexuals who make great contributions to the church and community and lead respectable lives.

"We need to respect them as persons and to educate people that these people have rights to their dignity," says the priest.

The issue needs to be addressed "because a lot of people suffer when things are not clarified".

But how to address it without being accused of "promoting" homosexuality? asks academic researcher Russell Heng.

"There are some real hurdles -- psychological, emotional, social, economic -- which gay people must face in many areas of their personal life and they want to talk about these issues."

So too heterosexuals who have a gay relative but who are unsure of how to deal with it because of the taboo nature of the subject, he says.

One factor, however, has become clear. Anyone who expects to make sense of Singapore society must accept that gay activities have become a more visible part of the social landscape.

No doubt, this will include the upcoming Speakers' Corner. There, speakers require no police permit, but only this: A Singaporean identity and the courage to face the crowd.